He'd expected that reaction, but no amount of expectation was comparable to how much it hurt when she said it. It's— It's not that I want to— But he did want to. And he couldn't explain that.
He should have asked her to wait before he told her. They were making a scene. But he couldn't leave now. If he got up, if they moved even an inch, she might just walk away. She might do that anyway. He understood that. But as long as he stayed sitting here maybe she wouldn't get up and nothing would ever change.
And he knew how ironic that was, that he was afraid that she'd leave, when he was the one who was leaving. And he knew how terrible that was, because he was the one who was responsible for this. But he couldn't say that.
"Th-they don't." Control yourself. "I sent them letters. In the mail." I wanted to see you personally, he wanted to add, but he didn't deserve to say it.
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He should have asked her to wait before he told her. They were making a scene. But he couldn't leave now. If he got up, if they moved even an inch, she might just walk away. She might do that anyway. He understood that. But as long as he stayed sitting here maybe she wouldn't get up and nothing would ever change.
And he knew how ironic that was, that he was afraid that she'd leave, when he was the one who was leaving. And he knew how terrible that was, because he was the one who was responsible for this. But he couldn't say that.
"Th-they don't." Control yourself. "I sent them letters. In the mail." I wanted to see you personally, he wanted to add, but he didn't deserve to say it.